How to Cultivate Contentment

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When I read Paul's shocking words "I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances" (Philippians 4:11), I sometimes wonder … how? What is the secret?

Life makes it easy to be discontent. We don't have to work hard to complain. Just look at what encourages us to grumble—from pervasive advertising that tells us what we lack, to housework that never ends, to our physical appearance (which always seems less than perfect). Even homeschooling can make us feel like we are never doing enough, are never good enough, or have a less-than-ideal family life.

But grumbling is such a lousy way to live! What can we do to combat this and learn, like Paul, how to be content? I appreciate what Charles Spurgeon wrote in a short devotional many years ago. (I read a daily devotional from him, and my daughter Jonelle receives these devotionals twice a day via email; you can sign up for that free service here.)

Spurgeon suggests that we must purposely cultivate contentment. I would add that practicing gratitude is one very practical way to do that. May Spurgeon's words encourage you as they did me:

"I have learned, in whatever state I am, therewith to be content." Philippians 4:11

These words show us that contentment is not a natural propensity of man. "Ill weeds grow apace." Covetousness, discontent, and murmuring are as natural to man as thorns are to the soil. We need not sow thistles and brambles; they come up naturally enough, because they are indigenous to earth: and so, we need not teach men to complain; they complain fast enough without any education. But the precious things of the earth must be cultivated. If we would have wheat, we must plough and sow; if we want flowers, there must be the garden, and all the gardener's care.

Now, contentment is one of the flowers of heaven, and if we would have it, it must be cultivated; it will not grow in us by nature; it is the new nature alone that can produce it, and even then we must be specially careful and watchful that we maintain and cultivate the grace which God has sown in us. Paul says, "I have learned ... to be content;" as much as to say, he did not know how at one time. It cost him some pains to attain to the mystery of that great truth. No doubt he sometimes thought he had learned, and then broke down. And when at last he had attained unto it, and could say, "I have learned in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content," he was an old, grey-headed man, upon the borders of the grave-a poor prisoner shut up in Nero's dungeon at Rome.

We might well be willing to endure Paul's infirmities, and share the cold dungeon with him, if we too might by any means attain unto his good degree. Do not indulge the notion that you can be contented with learning, or learn without discipline. It is not a power that may be exercised naturally, but a science to be acquired gradually. We know this from experience. Brother, hush that murmur, natural though it be, and continue a diligent pupil in the College of Content.

I pray that I become more content each passing year. Will you join me on that journey?

Sincerely,
Sarita

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Puzzling Design

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My sister and her family came to town for the holidays. We were able to celebrate our annual Family Fun Week—where we gather together from across the country as a whole group. For the past several years the adults have used the evenings to build puzzles while we talk. This year, my sister-in-law Brittany, my sister Amy and I broke into a new skill set: necklaces.

We worked on our jewelry over several nights. And at least for me, it was very telling. I am definitely a people-pleaser, so the pressure of knowing others would look at what I was creating caused me to quake.

My designs changed significantly as the days went on. I became more aware of what I actually wanted in a necklace and what I would really wear. The final evening, Amy asked me to create matching designs for the three of us girls using beads she especially liked. Since Brittany is in a different color palette than Amy and me, I knew I’d need to add something different to hers. I decided that to truly create something we would all love I would need to use the same elements in three unique ways. I was nervous but pressed on anyway.

Necklaces I designed for the three of us: Amy, Brittany, and Me

Funny that something as simple as designing necklaces for family would cause me to stress out. I sometimes struggle with the fact that I desire to make things more beautiful. It is part of who God made me to want to be surrounded by beauty. C’mon God! Why not a wonderful ability to speak? Why not clear insight or a really good mind for languages or numbers so I could really be effective for your kingdom?

This past week, I mentioned to my husband Dave that it grieves my heart to know there are children who never hear that they are important. Who never heard that God loved them so much He sent His Son to die for their sins. Who may never know they can do what He has called them to do.

And I was struck: I don’t really believe that for me. When I look at myself I see all the shortcomings ... the fear of speaking, the lack of a mind for languages. I tend to view my abilities as somehow less than important. I scoff at the fact that a delight in beauty could have something to do with God. That an ability to see patterns and colors would have anything to do with serving Him.

Our church is doing a series on breakthrough. Realizing how little value I place on myself and who God has made me has brought that to front of mind. I want to break through my own self-talk and fears and be who God has designed me to be. Regardless of what others think or what I feel would be more “effective.” If I want to tell others they have value, I have to also recognize my own value. Even with something as simple as designing a necklace.

Until next time!
-Jonelle

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Homeschool Advantage: A Clearer Picture of Your Kids

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Kids go through a lot, especially as they get older. I've witnessed my fair share of breakups and breakdowns in the small group of kids I have the privilege of knowing. It's rarely pretty. It's often messy. Worse, there comes a point where there is no "win" situation. Rather, there is but the path you should walk and the path you could stay on... which both look rather bleak.

In those times, it's me they come to. Not their parents. They wouldn't even think of telling their parents!

And part of that is, I'm pretty sure, a natural consequence of being a parent. I know my mom and dad always told me that I could come talk to them about anything, but there were things I decided not to share with them. It was more comfortable to confide in a more removed, third-party. But even though my parents didn't know everything going on in my life, they had a pretty clear picture of what I was going through.

The parents of the school children I know are far less in touch.

How could they be? Their kids are gone for the majority of the day. There are also other engagements. And it's often the case that the parents work, further distancing both parties.

As homeschoolers, we spend a ton of time together. Even without snooping, we can get a sense of what's going on. And the close proximity and general availability give us many opportunities to check in and see what's up. Also, because we're there, learning together, discussion and questions are already part of the relationship.

Do you have any tips for staying connected with your kids, whether while homeschooling or after they've "left the nest"?

 ~Luke Holzmann
Filmmaker, Writer, Empty Nester

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What's in a Name?

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We sit on the floor. The conversation wanders lazily as she shares her story. One parent had been interested in homeschooling, the other wasn't willing to risk it. "Mama once got an email signed by Sarita. It came on her birthday right after my grandma died."

Her huge eyes, so akin to the anime she loves, begin to mist with tears. "It meant so much to her. I realize you probably don't know Sarita, but just the fact that you work at Sonlight means a lot to my mom."

"You know who Sarita is, right?" Inwardly, I'm giddy with the news I'm about to drop on her. "Sarita is my mom."

Instantly we have a bond, a connection, a point of reference that links this girl, her mom, and me. The other terms we've used--homeschooler, Christian, friend--none have sparked anything close to light that my family's name ignited.

Names allow us to connect. We like our labels, our terms, our groups. We also use names to create stereotypes. Depending on your affiliations, terms like homeschooler, Catholic, liberal, stay at home mom, modesty, and anti-vax conjure very different images. I think this is the foundation for the recent "What I Really Do" meme.

So what's in a name?

The opportunity to connect or distance yourself. Be it the Hatfields and the McCoys, the Capulets and Montagues, an alien "Bugger" race, or even the defense of one's name presented in The Crucible, which side you're on and what the other side thinks can have devastating results. That's why I appreciate Sonlight's commitment to helping you see all sides of an issue. When we better understand, we can connect and communicate even if we disagree.

And it's possible that when Brittany and I finally get to meet this girl's mom, she may decide we're not her favorite people. But, with the connection that we have and the opportunity to see her side of things, I think we'll be able to get along.

Do homeschoolers have a good name in your area? Are there any groups you're a part of that have a name from which you wish you could distance yourself?

 ~Luke Holzmann
Filmmaker, Writer, Empty Nester

P.S. If you're interested in seeing what some homeschoolers really do, check out the 2012 Sonlight Scholarship Winners.

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Loving God with Your Mind

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Today is Valentine's Day, but I'm not going to blog about St. Valentine or the modern holiday named after him (you can Google that easily if you want). I'm also not going to blog about the element Lawrencium, first synthesized on February 14, 1961.

But I am going to blog about love, specifically in reference to our love of God and how it relates to intellect and education.

A man once asked Jesus, "which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" (Matthew 22:36) Jesus replied: "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself" (Matthew 22:37-39, ESV).

This response is interesting on many levels, but for our purposes what is truly fascinating is the call to use the mind in relation to our love of God. This is especially relevant at a time when Christianity is under attack by various critics. One false charge often made is that Christianity is anti-intellectual, relying on a leap of blind faith and emotions alone rather than any kind of sound reasoning.

Biblically speaking, this is quite a misunderstanding. Not only does Jesus value the use of the mind in relation to loving God, but God is also a reasonable being. In Isaiah 1:18, for example, God says, "Come, now, let us reason together ..." First Thessalonians 5:21, moreover, encourages us to "examine everything carefully" and "hold fast to that which is good" (NASB). Paul also emphasized the importance of reason in relation to faith when he said in response to a doubter, "What I am saying is true and reasonable" (Acts 26:25, NIV).

This doesn't mean that we're pure logical beings, called to love God only with our minds in some sort of detached, robotic way. There's room for intellect and emotion in the Christian life. God wants us to think and feel deeply, but we need to be careful about keeping the life of the mind and the life of the emotions in a healthy balance.

When creating curriculum for Sonlight, one of my goals is to always encourage and help children along so that they can use their God-given intellects to seek true understanding of the world around them. We are blessed with wonderful mental capabilities. In our lifelong pursuit of education and wisdom we should strive to love God with heart, soul, and mind.

For more on this topic see Love Your God with All Your Mind by J.P. Moreland and Habits of the Mind by James Sire.

Robert Velarde
Author/Educator/Philosopher

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The Skill You Need vs the Stuff You Know

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I've already shared about not knowing what a mandible is. I've said that you don't need to mind the gaps. I've even questioned the purpose of tests. So I wondered this morning: What difference does it make if your child can't finish the sentence, "Mary had a little ____?"

Sure, this is basic stuff. But so are John 3:16, the definitions of "trial," the number of laps that make up a mile (swimming and running), the conversion from Fahrenheit to Celsius, as well as the difference between the Mean, Median, and Mode... to name a few. In fact, libraries are packed with knowledge I haven't learned in my limited time.

So how do we determine "Core Knowledge?" What kinds of things will we decide belong on National Standards? What points of data are we certain everyone should know (and for how long)?

The answers to such questions are as interesting as they are important.

I focus on something else entirely. Rather than think about all the stuff I know, I prefer to focus on a much more important skill: learning. If I enjoy and am able to learn, I'll pick up the stuff I need to know. If I can make connections between the things I'm able to recall, I can build and grow from those lessons. And if I know where to find information and how to extract and hold on it, I can meet the challenges before me.

The stuff you know is important, to be sure, but the ability to learn is ever so much more essential.

Do you have a story of a time you didn't know something "everyone" knows?

 ~Luke Holzmann
Filmmaker, Writer, Empty Nester

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2012 Sonlight Scholarship Winners

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Sonlight students exemplify academic excellence, creativity & servanthood

Does homeschooling work? Well, the Sonlight Seniors who apply to our scholarship program each year would certainly say it does. Out of this year’s highly qualified pool of applicants, we are thrilled to announce the 2012 scholarship winners.
These students have blossomed into mature young adults. Like so many Sonlight students, they show exceptional character, are active in their communities, and represent the cause of Christ exceedingly well. They demonstrate leadership, mission-mindedness, a heart for learning, creativity and spiritual depth. They are well prepared for the academic rigors of college. And though the scholarship committee chooses winners based on much more than test scores, several do have very high scores.
These students’ eagerness to follow God’s leading and their exceptional skills and talents make us delighted to invest in their education.
Sonlight will award $88,000 over the next four years to these twelve Sonlight Scholarship winners
(we’ve awarded $876,500 since we began the scholarship program!). All of these hard-working, talented students have completed at least five Sonlight History / Bible / Literature programs (including high school level programs). We look forward to seeing all God does in and through them as they take what they’ve learned—through Sonlight and their homeschool experience—into college and the world.

Winner of the $20,000 award

($5,000 each year for 4 years)

Elijah Coleman

Elijah Coleman
With a true heart for the Lord, Elijah Coleman of Augusta,
GA
also has a brilliant mind. He is poised to impact the worlds of Math and Science.
Elijah has used Sonlight all the way from first grade through high school. With a 2260 on his SAT, he is also a National Merit Finalist. Thanks to dual enrollment classes, he will graduate high school with 43 hours of college credit. He has already helped teach a college Calculus course, presented research at an undergraduate math conference and set a university record at a collegiate math competition.
A well-rounded young man and natural leader, Elijah also excels in sports, academics, drama, music and service to others. He has an evangelist’s heart and embraces opportunities at dual-enrollment classes to build meaningful relationships with non-believers and share Christ with them. He is a role model to younger siblings, serves as a junior high youth group leader at church and has participated in mission trips to Ethiopia and Peru.
Elijah sees God’s beauty revealed in mathematics and looks forward to teaching the subject at the high school or college level. Elijah also loves to play soccer and perform in musicals.

Winners of $10,000 Awards

($2,500 per year)

Sarah Leichty

Sarah Leichty of Bourbon, IN lives to serve others. She is
keenly aware of the needs around her, and moves quickly to care for and bless others.
With a heart for missions, Sarah is studying Teaching English as a Second Language and English Education at Grace College in Indiana. When she was 12, her family moved to China for a year, and Sarah eagerly found opportunities to teach English. She has maintained relationships with many of those Chinese friends and continues to share the Gospel with them. She has served short-term in India and will soon spend a semester teaching English in Israel and working with a missionary team there.
Sarah is a talented classical violinist and also serves on her church’s worship team. The fifth child of eleven, she selflessly cares for younger siblings.
Sarah used Sonlight for many years, including all of high school. Her dream is to serve cross-culturally teaching English and sharing the love of Jesus.

Luke Macfarlan

Luke Macfarlan of Siloam Springs, AR has earned the rank of Eagle Scout, and remains very involved in his Troop. He continues to mentor younger Scout leaders. With admirable work ethic and a commitment to service, Luke is a blessing to his family and community.
A faithful and active member of his church, Luke serves as a middle school boys leader. He is President of his local homeschool group Teen Board and has completed the vast requirements to become a Congressional Award Gold Medalist.
Luke has used Sonlight from third grade through high school. He is a National Merit Finalist and an excellent debater, placing well in many oratory competitions and essay contests.
Luke plans to major in Chemistry at John Brown University and hopes to use his work skills on the short term mission field as an adult. Luke also enjoys skiing, hiking, backpacking, reading, traveling, running and playing sports with friends.

Victoria Rigel

Victoria Rigel of Mercer, PA a creative young musician with a heart for reaching others with the love of God. She plans to study Voice and Contemporary Christian Music at Central Christian College of Kansas.
Victoria has used Sonlight for all of high school as she has competed in Speech and Debate, played volleyball on a local homeschool team, and performed major roles in musicals at the local public high school. She plays the recorder, oboe, piano, guitar and mandolin. A skilled singer-songwriter, Victoria encourages others with songs of God’s work in her own life and the lives of those around her. She often plays in local coffeehouses and other venues.
Victoria effuses an eagerness to learn, and goes out of her way to care for others. She is a beloved mentor to younger students and has served as a counselor at a Christian camp.

Samuel Sinquefield

The well-rounded Samuel Sinquefield of Zachary, LA hopes to make a difference in the world through medicine. An outstanding student, Samuel has used Sonlight since Kindergarten, completing every program from A through 530. He scored a 34 on the ACT and is a National Merit Finalist. He has always loved science and plans to major in biochemistry at Louisiana State University. He hopes to continue on to medical school and become an ophthalmologist, helping those with serious eye problems.
An accomplished pianist, Samuel plays with beauty and intensity. He performs well in competitions and plans to minor in piano at college. Samuel is also the captain of his basketball team and was selected for 1st Team All-State by the Louisiana Christian School Athletic Association.
Samuel loves children, and is very involved in the children’s ministry at his church. He is a worthy role model and a favorite among the kids. Samuel also enjoys reading, tennis, golf, swimming, and water polo.

Winners of $4,000 Awards

($1,000 each year)

Sonlight will award seven additional students a
$1,000 scholarship for each year of college (up to
four years). We’re confident all these winners will
make a positive mark in the world and continue
on the path of lifelong learning.
Winners in alphabetical order are:

Claire Bonin

Claire Bonin of Belgium plans to attend Southwestern Assemblies of God University and hopes to study Missions, Biblical Studies, Music and/or Teaching English as a Second Language. A sensitive and technically talented pianist, Claire attends a local music academy. In addition to classical study, Claire leads praise and worship times for her youth group, plays the piano for her local church and has accompanied the children's choir for Christmas programs. She has worked at missionary training conferences, caring for and encouraging younger missionary kids. With a heart for telling others about Christ, Claire cherishes her many opportunities to share the Gospel in daily life. She has a great ability to adapt and live within a multicultural setting, and is excited to see what type of mission work God has for her, whether in the United States or abroad.

Benjamin Davis

Benjamin Davis of Springer, NM plans to study History or Economics at Patrick Henry College or Hillsdale College. He has used Sonlight since second grade and displays a true eagerness to learn and work hard. He helps run his family's cattle ranch and thrives on the difficult tasks of caring for cattle and pastures. Active in his community, Benjamin especially loves 4-H, where he has enjoyed leadership positions, public speaking competitions, community service, agriculture study, science projects and forestry study. He is a leader in TeenPact, a teen civic engagement program. Benjamin helps lead the 3rd-6th graders at his church's AWANA program and helps run the summer reading program at his local library. A well-rounded young man, Benjamin plays in the worship band at church, sings in a community choir, and is an expert skier.

Erica Meerbach

Erica Meerbach of Canton, GA loves to sing and plans to study music in college. She participates in an Atlanta-area choir and competes in many solo vocal competitions. Using her talents at her local church, Erica sings in the worship choir and plays guitar, bass and keyboard in the praise band. Erica has used Sonlight from first grade through high school. For her senior year of high school, she is joint-enrolled at Reinhardt University as she completes her Sonlight studies. She teaches beginning piano and helps her church put on a summer Singing and Drama Camp each year. To complete her Girl Scout Gold Award, Erica developed, organized and participated in a choral clinic for girls in grades 6-12. The clinic was a great success and encouraged many young women to become interested in music.

Thomas Ridgway

Thomas Ridgway of Shorewood, IL plans to study piano performance in college. He is passionate about his music and has won many honors, including the Metropolitan Youth Symphony Orchestra Concerto Competition and the privilege of performing in a concert for the Illinois Philharmonic Orchestra. He also plays the bassoon and loves to play the piano in local nursing homes. Thomas is an AWANA leader for elementary-age boys at his church, where he also serves as a sound assistant. With a true heart for serving people who are homeless, Thomas frequently joins in outreach opportunities. Thomas has used Sonlight through all of high school.

Annabelle Tsai

Annabelle Tsai of Malaysia plans to study Music at Rice University in Texas, where she will concentrate on violin performance. After her undergraduate degree, she hopes to pursue medical school and become a doctor. With a true heart for the underprivileged, Annabelle works with a UN program to teach English to Myanmar refugees and has participated in several mission trips to impoverished people groups in Cambodia and Malaysia. She is involved in many stewardship efforts to care for the environment and animals and is a veterinarian assistant at a local animal shelter. Annabelle is also a seasoned traveler and a very talented fencer. She has used Sonlight for all of high school.

Rebecca Willett

Rebecca Willett of Virginia Beach, VA hopes to attend the Eastman School of Music and study Piano Performance. A very talented musician, she practices the piano up to six hours a day and is working toward becoming a concert pianist. Rebecca has used Sonlight from 1st through 12th grade and is an exceptional student who loves to learn. She helps with the children's ministry at her church, has participated in several mission trips and volunteers for a therapeutic equestrian program for disabled children. She has served her church as the pianist for worship services since she was 14 years old. Rebecca is also part of a swim team and is known for her creativity and kindness.

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