Raising Kids Who Can Focus in a Distracted Digital Age

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Raising Kids Who Can Focus in a Distracted Digital Age

Is your child’s attention span longer than a goldfish? Are you deliberately raising kids who can focus deeply?

According to a recent study, a goldfish has an attention span of nine seconds, while most people lose concentration after only eight.

In the early 2000s (the dawn of the smartphone), that number was higher at 12 seconds. Researchers think this may indicate that our constant use of digital technology is actually reshaping our brains and shrinking our attention.

So what’s the most important thing we can teach our kids in this age of social media, texting and instant information?

Kids Who Can Focus are Successful Kids

I think the skill that will incline people to greater success in this generation is the ability to focus.

They need to learn other things as well, of course. But consider this—the blockage in education used to be access to information. For example, if you lived in England in the year 1500, you'd be lucky to know how to read, let alone own a single book or live near a library.

But today your children probably have more information at their fingertips than they could ever use. They have books and the internet at their disposal. A quick Google search can yield information about nearly anything. But many children today are unable to effectively use this information because they are not learning how to concentrate.

I know some high school students who think they can do good scholarly work while texting constantly with friends and checking Facebook every two minutes. In fact, the average young adult in America checks his smart phone 74 times a day. I don't believe that serves them well. Rather, I believe we must help our kids learn how to purposely avoid constant interruptions, to stand against the barrage of information … and actually focus on the task at hand.

The Power of Executive Control

I read a fascinating article about this in The Wall Street Journal titled Learning How to Focus on Focus. The subtitle says it all: "In an age of information overload, simply paying attention is the hardest thing." I wish I could let you read it all, but the full article, apparently, is available only to subscribers.

The author, Jonah Lehrer, refers to "executive function," which he defines as "a collection of cognitive skills that allow us to exert control over our thoughts and impulses." He cites studies that suggest that people who learned to regulate their impulses as children (e.g., sitting and focusing on homework instead of running over to watch TV), were far less likely to reach extremes such as becoming criminals or being addicted to drugs later in life. In fact, Lehrer says, "In many instances, the ability to utilize executive control was more predictive of adult outcomes than either IQ scores or socioeconomic status."

That's good news to me. Why? Because regardless of children's natural IQ or socioeconomic position, we can definitely help them increase their ability to concentrate. Parents can help children do this through activities that require them to focus. (And by turning off the TV, cell phone and computer while they concentrate.)

I love this quote from the article:

Given the age in which we live, it makes no sense to obsess over the memorization of facts that can be looked up on a smartphone. It's not enough to drill kids in arithmetic and hope that they develop delayed gratification by accident. We need to teach the skills of executive function directly and creatively.

The article suggests that activities like art, physical exercise, tae-kwon-do, and difficult board games can all help children increase their ability to focus. I've seen 7-year-olds fall in love with chess and play games that last for hours. And let me tell you, when children become that engrossed in thinking, good things happen in their brains.

In our family, Justin played chess for hours as a very young child, Jonelle loved working jigsaw puzzles, Luke filmed movies, and Amy read. They still continue these hobbies to this day!

Raise Kids Who Can Focus by Limiting Distractions

I'd also like to encourage you to limit the number of distractions your children regularly encounter.

It is perfectly reasonable to ask your children to sit down and work without access to electronic distractions. That skill alone will help your children their entire lives.

One of the benefits of a literature-based education is that the very process of learning together through real books is shaping your children’s brains for the better each day and giving your whole family a deep dive into the world of ideas—a respite from swimming in the shallows of social media and the constant stimulation of the digital world.

When we limit access to devices and build positive relational time around good books, we are cultivating a love for something truly good for our students. We aren’t just removing screens, but filling their minds and hearts with the good stuff that will serve as a springboard not only for imagination, creativity and critical thinking, but also the rare discipline of full attention.

So what do you think? Do parents today have to work harder to help their children learn delayed gratification and focus? What has helped your own children learn to block out distractions and concentrate?

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Being (and Staying) Content With Your Homeschool Curriculum

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Being (and Staying) Content With Your Homeschool Curriculum • syndicated with permission from Delightful Learning by Michelle Gibson

This post was originally published as Being Content With Your Curriculum on Delightful Learning. It is reposted here with permission of the author, Michelle Gibson.

When it comes to homeschooling, we all too often meddle with something that is already quite wonderful—our curriculum. The newness wears off. We get bored with it. We try to make it better. Or we see what other homeschoolers are using, and we want to do the same.

In the process of meddling, we forget to enjoy what we have.

I often take running water for granted. I take long baths and fill the kitchen sink with hot soapy water not thinking about the fact that I have running water. Then, we make a trip to our off-grid home in Montana where we don't have running water. We haul our water in 5 gallon containers, and when I take a bath, I heat the water in pots on a wood cook stove. It's a lot of work, but I revel in the moment. I have wood to burn, heat to warm the water with, and a tub to put the water in. We even have pipes to carry the water out of the house. It's quiet and peaceful, and I get to unplug from the world, hear the cricket's chirp, and see the stars shine bright in the night sky.

It takes a conscious awareness to savor everyday moments. How often do we revel in the ordinary, the mundane, or even the uncomfortable?

We live in a drafty, old rental house and we've been here longer than any home I've ever lived in, and I love to move - it's a time of purging and fresh starts, so I wanted desperately to move to a cozy house of my own with lots of windows, natural light, and a front door that isn't falling off its hinges. But, I took down the dark insulating curtains and put up sheer curtains to let more light in. I rearranged. I purged. I painted. I learned to be content.

In the same way, we can be content with our homeschool curriculum if we purpose to be.

Year after year, I heap curriculum on top of curriculum to eliminate gaps and provide my kids with the best of the best. But, I was recently challenged to stop doubling up and pick the one that does it better.

So, I chose Sonlight.

Sonlight is a good fit for our homeschool because Sonlight's main goal is to inspire a love of learning. Our children can't possibly learn everything they need to know before they leave home, so Sonlight developed a Christ-centered, literature-rich curriculum that builds family bonds, cultural literacy, and academic excellence, while cultivating children’s natural curiosity and love for stories, giving them a love for learning that will prepare them to be lifelong learners.

There are more reasons we love Sonlight, but today I want to share how I plan to be content with just one curriculum after years of heaping curriculum on top of curriculum.

How to Have a More Content Homeschool

Keep a fresh perspective

Count your blessings. Find the beauty in what you are doing. Find the moments that enrich your days and be grateful for the little things: a cup of tea, a good book, a home to live in, children to homeschool.

Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. — 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

Take a good look at your homeschool and find the moments that bring joy, the subjects you take delight in teaching, and the simple pastimes that make you happy. Find the beauty and goodness in what you have. Appreciate the little things, and be grateful for what you have.

Stop comparing yourself to others. We spend time carefully choosing and praying over our selections before hitting the submit button. Rest in that. The grass isn't always greener on the other side.

Remember that being content is a choice. If you are bored or sick of doing the same thing, find one new thing to do each week - have a tea party, pop popcorn, bake apples, or take school outside for the day.

You don't have to be good at everything. Don't take yourself so seriously, have a sense of humor, and avoid being a perfectionist.

Live in the present

Be satisfied with who you are and what you have - right now.

Don't worry about tomorrow.

"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." — Phillipians 4:6-7

Do the next thing. When you make a habit of doing the next thing, you will be more intentional and feel more purposeful. If you focus on today and what needs done right now, you will accomplish more than you thought possible.

Simplify your life, if needed. You'll have less to worry about, right?

If you feel like you are falling behind, just open your IG and do the next thing. Don't worry about staying on schedule - just get through today.

Stay committed to homeschooling

Stay committed even if you don't feel like it.Consider Charlotte Mason's motto:

I am... a homeschool mom.
I can… do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
I ought… to do my duty to God and my children.
I will… choose the right.

You will have good days and bad. When times are tough, say to yourself, "I will... do the work of homeschooling."

Practice self-discipline. Find a rhythm or routine that works for you. Develop healthy habits. Create a schedule or start a daily tracker - whatever works for you.

Make changes if necessary, but think long and hard about what is standing in the way of you being content, and don't change everything - don't throw the baby out with the bath water. In other words, don't eliminate something that is working when trying to get rid of something that isn't. Ask God what He wants you to learn in your present circumstance, instead of telling Him what you want Him to change.

It may take time, but you must persevere.

And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. — Galatians 6:9

Not too long ago, I was taking my weekly soak, and I was so thankful for the deep claw foot tub filled with hot, salty water to soak in and the cool breeze coming in through the window to cool me, that I felt so happy and content. Then, I quickly felt a check in my heart to not be too content that God can't move me from this place. It was then that I realized that I could learn to find contentment wherever He wants me to be.

However, I am still learning to be content when it comes to homeschool curriculum. I have filled our days with unit studies, hands-on activities, and experiences on top of a full curriculum for years. But, I over-plan and burn out often. When I get overwhelmed like this, I crave a boxed curriculum all planned out for me. But, I can never let it be. I always try to make it better.

This year I am ready for a break from planning, from scheduling, from over-doing. I want to be content, and I want a curriculum that I know works for us without all the work.

I want to be able to close the school room door at the end of the day and not worry about tomorrow.
So, in deciding which one does the job the best, I went with the company I have used since the beginning, and I am going to be content and see how God can work in our homeschool.

My goal is to use Sonlight as is without heaping any other curriculum on top.

My rule: any projects or activities must be a suggested activity in the guide or be inspired by a book itself. "Inspired by" could mean anything from making something mentioned in a book (a craft, a project, a recipe) or adding to a suggested activity in a natural and meaningful way. My goal is to do projects or activities that have true educational value and that come naturally.

When you buy from Sonlight, you get a great product that produces proven results. To learn more about the perks of shopping with Sonlight, visit Sonlight Cares.

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Homeschooling with Morning Sickness

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Homeschooling with Morning Sickness

I have some amazing news:  I’m going to have a baby! I also have some less exciting news: I’ve been overwhelmed with morning sickness for the past three months.

Homeschooling in the everyday can be challenging enough, but when you don’t feel well, the task can seem insurmountable. My ordinary, non-pregnant self loves reading aloud, playing outside with the kids, and planning homeschool lessons. My pregnant version (at least the first trimester model) mostly wants to stay in bed with the covers pulled over her head.

My second and third pregnancies were spent changing diapers, making meals, reading books, and orchestrating lots of free play in the backyard. While I’m still doing a lot of those activities this pregnancy, I’m also homeschooling a preschooler and a kindergartener. In many ways having younger kids while pregnant can be fabulous; the school work isn’t overly demanding and a list of daily must-dos are largely unnecessary. If I miss a day or a week, the year isn’t a total loss.

On the other hand, having young kids also means that there is little opportunity for independent work. Sure, they are great at coloring or doing puzzles for small periods of time, largely unassisted, but they need me to actively oversee most activities—homeschooling and otherwise.

The majority of their day is still spent in direct interaction with me while they learn to master reading and writing, which will take their studies to a more independent level in a few years.

Here's what I'm doing to make this challenging season of pregnancy and morning sickness more rewarding for the whole family.

1. Setting Realistic Expectations

The human body is amazing. It is truly a miracle that I am growing inside me a living human being who will soon be gathered around our table. Yet pregnancy and having a newborn have taught me that I have to recognize and respect my physical limits.

When I push myself too hard, we all suffer. Worn out, tired Mom is simply not the best for homeschooling or anything else.

Expecting another baby is emotionally stimulating not only for me; it’s also a time of transition for my kids and husband, too. While my little ones are happy about having a new sibling, they also still desire their own time with Momma. Fortunately, reading aloud is a favorite family activity that covers both bases of homeschooling and family bonding.

My husband works hard away from home, and still willingly pitches in with housework and errands. I’ve come to realize, though, that when my sweet hubby is already cleaning litter boxes, running last minute errands for foods I think I can stomach, and redoing the budget to ensure we can still afford mortgage payments and hospital bills, asking him to step up and assume additional homeschool responsibilities may be overwhelming. Sometimes for all our sakes, I simply need to step back, slow down, and cross a big chunk of tasks off the list.

I tell myself that it's okay to change my expectations during this short season of pregnancy when my children are so little. If it takes us two or even three weeks to make it through five days of our Sonlight Instructor's Guide, that's okay. We just do the next thing and keep moving forward however slowly it may be.

2. Making Self-Care a Priority

As a family, we cooperate to make sure that my health and that of our baby is a top priority. Every pregnancy is different, and I’ve had my fair share of associated risks. Finding ways that the kids and husband can help take care of me and the baby has been a learning experience for all of us.

I get enough rest.

The kids stay in their rooms until a specified time each morning— when a green light on a click signals that it's okay to get up for the day.

I stay hydrated and eat well.

My kids love getting water out of our refrigerator, so they are in charge of making sure Mommy’s glass stays full. Sure, there are occasional puddles on the kitchen floor, but we have a well placed towel that gets checked routinely for just this reason.

Eating balanced meals and small snacks help with nausea and indigestion, and my kids are great reminders for this. They are all about having snacks during read alouds and love healthy foods like apple slices and nuts.

I exercise.

The kids and I walk, dance to videos, and even have tried some pregnancy yoga together.

I have enjoyable downtime.

Even if it’s just for a few minutes everyday, I take the time to relax with a book, a favorite television program, or a few minutes of bird watching. I have to remember to take advantage of times when the kids are engaged in unstructured play, running around outside or being looked after by my husband or mother. It can be tempting to do just a little more planning or wash a few more clothes during those moments, but my emotional well-being is important, too, so I invest in it.

3. Making Sure Homeschool Happens

Even as I cut back significantly and reduce the family’s overall academic workload, there are still plenty of chances to sneak in some learning for my preKer and Kindergartener even while bearing up under morning sickness. Here are things that seem to work well for me.

  • Try being still. Lie down in bed or on the couch while reading and discussing Read-Alouds.
  • Get outside. Fresh air can help abate nausea and give younger kids time to run off excess energy.
  • Incorporate snacks. Reading aloud can be more fun for them and more tolerable for Mom when no one has an empty stomach.
  • Change up the schedule. Do the more intense subjects during times of the day when morning sickness symptoms are slightest.
  • Share some of the responsibility. Dad may also have a lot on his plate, but he and other friends and relatives may be excellent substitutes.
  • Most importantly, give grace to yourself, to your kids, and to your husband.

Remember, Momma, this is only for a short season, even if it lasts all nine months. The experience the kids will get from watching another life form, grow, and be born can’t be covered in a book.

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Three Reasons to Immerse Your Children in a Foreign Language Now

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Discover why your children can benefit from studying a foreign language and get tips on which foreign language may be the best for your child's educational path.

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Homeschooling Away From Home During Crisis or Displacement

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For months we had been fine tuning our plan to repair our basement and then move downstairs so the renovation crew could work on the upper portion of our house. Just minutes into our final meeting, the crew laid their news on us: “We think you need to move out for the duration of the renovation.”

I could hardly comprehend the words coming out of the mouth of our contractor. The project was slated to take more than six months, and we were scheduled to start in two weeks.

Homeschooling Away From Home

As the meeting ended, we had accepted that it was better for us to move but had no idea how it would work out. I remember being so overwhelmed by having to leave everything behind on such short notice, packing only what was essential.

Maybe you've faced a crisis of your own:

  • a natural disaster
  • sickness or intensive medical treatment
  • political upheaval or visa troubles if you live abroad
  • a huge remodeling project like my example

Whatever circumstances may cause the disruption to your school year, I think the principles I learned during the six-month displacement from my home will help you cope as you wait for repairs, hope for waters to recede, or await the green light from your doctor.

Finding My Way Beyond the Obstacles

We ended up finding an unoccupied house in the next city. Unfortunately it was forty-miles from my husband's work and our construction site. The good news was it was awaiting foreclosure and the price was right—free.

We were able to store our belongings by renting a semi trailer which was unceremoniously dropped into our front yard, and we packed everything we owned in a week's time.

With a suitcase of clothes, our current school books, and the basics to outfit a kitchen, we walked into an adventure.

Helping Our Kids Respond to Crisis

Our relocation home was far from ideal. We had never lived in a neighborhood before, so moving ten country kids into the city was challenging for everyone involved. To compensate for the stress, I made self-care a higher priority. Finding spaces of quiet time helped me feel less trapped. I started walking the dog in the evenings to wind down and have thinking time.

Over the six months, we struggled with many of the same problems you have faced if you've lived through a crisis that displaced you from your home:

  • Dad had to be away for extended periods of time.
  • Nothing worked in the temporary home where we were staying.
  • Our dwelling had the tiniest fridge I have ever seen; we could keep only two to three meals' worth of food in it.
  • There were so many forms, questions, and appointments during our time of transition.
  • There were things we should have packed but didn't. And we didn't use other things that we did bring along.

While we were stretched and pulled, we also grew and flexed. We learned many ways to cope with an unfavorable situation.

Making Displacement a Family Adventure

As parents, we have a huge part in shaping  the attitude our kids develop toward any situation. Trust me when I say, moving was not a happy shift in circumstances. It was a terrible inconvenience and cost, but we had no choice. If we wanted the repairs done to our home, we had to move out.

We decided to speak to the kids as if there were a great adventure. Adventures are sometimes hard and require cooperation with everyone acting as a team to do their part. This mindset helped us cope:

  • when the shower overflowed
  • when the washer stopped working
  • when the white kitchen tiles met mulberry season and 20 purple feet

Through it all, I reminded myself I was on an adventure. This perspective helped me cope with one of the most challenging years I have ever faced.

Using Season Passes to Get out of the (Temporary) House

One of the first things we did was get a family season pass to our local science center, zoo, and history museum.

Although I was thankful for a house to live in, it was small and had virtually no furniture. We brought our curriculum to keep our homeschool routine, but we had none of our toys or games and could bear to watch only so much television.

A season pass to fun and educational venues was a great way to get out of the house whenever we needed a break. Plus, I could build on the experiences for Science and History lessons!

It was a large expense up front, but after the initial payment, we appreciated the ability to go for a quick visit anytime we needed a break. Living away from the comforts of home made us cranky at times, so short visits were a better choice for our large family. The pass made it painless to leave when we felt done and visit when it fit our day or mood.

If you know a homeschooler who is displaced and are wondering what you can do for them, event passes, movie tickets, memberships to a local attraction are meaningful gifts which go a long way to give a family a few hours of relief from their day to day stress.

Finding a New Hobby or Creative Activity

Getting out of the house with a bunch of kids is a daunting task. Trying to do it when you are in a strange city, alone, a little depressed, and feeling overwhelmed is nothing short of intimidating. I knew we would need a motivator to keep us from staying inside and relying on television. We took up geocaching to give us something fun to look forward to outside.

Geocaching is totally free. All you need to do is download one of the most popular apps and choose the map location you want to explore. We used it as a way to explore our new town during our frequent errands related to the home renovations. Stopping to make a couple of geocache searches helped the kids be more enthusiastic about trips to the hardware store. All it cost me was a handful of garage sale trinkets to trade in the cache boxes we found. (We could take one item and leave behind another to make an exchange.)

Organizing with a Crate System

Back at home we had yards and yards of book shelves. Everyone had a place for their school items and books. In our temporary home we had nothing of the sort. To remedy the lack of organization, I bought large crates and pencil boxes for each child to store his books and supplies. With these crates, we added a little bit of order to our chaotic lives.

Our situation of remodeling and rebuilding called for a lot of contractor meetings and hardware store runs. Our crates made it easier to salvage our “on the road” school days because the crates were easy to grab and load into the van. I was so thankful for the Sonlight Instructor's Guides that kept me on track day by day. I didn't have to plan homeschool lessons. We simply did the next thing.

My advice to someone going through a displacement is this: If you need to scrap school for a day or a week, don't hesitate to do it. The beauty of homeschooling is that we aren't bound to a certain schedule.

A long displacement might be the best time for a visit to distant family or for the kids to go stay at the grandparents for a longer visit than you might have chosen otherwise. Through your displacement, I pray that you know and carry the peace that only Christ can give you in times of distress and chaos. It sustained me through that difficult school year indeed!

Simplify your homeschool and reduce the burden of daily decision making. Try three weeks of any Sonlight Instructor's Guide for free. Click here to get one for any level, preschool through twelfth grade.

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7 Ways to Cultivate a Positive Math Culture in Your Homeschool

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7 Ways to Cultivate a Positive Math Culture in Your Homeschool

More than likely, you are a family of book lovers. You probably have stacks in every room, tucked away in baskets or neat piles because you have run out of shelf space for all the novels and reference volumes in your collection. You value reading, and developing a family culture of literacy comes naturally. But what about math?

Does your home give equal footing to math when it comes to your family's values? How can you generate (or boost) a positive math culture in your homeschool?

1. Stop Saying “Math is hard.”

Culturally, we have a tendency to frame both mathematics (theory) and arithmetic (calculation) as difficult, and only meant to be truly understood by a select few. Can you imagine the damage we’d cause if we had this attitude toward reading and literacy? It would have a profoundly negative affect, not just on our individual students, but on our culture as a whole. Yet, we continue to perpetuate the “math is hard” idea, presenting it as something we just need to struggle through.

Consider Singapore, a country whose students consistently rank at the top of global math scores. Culturally, Singapore has refreshingly positive outlook about everyone’s math potential.  A recent report from the United Kingdom’s National Numeracy organization supports the idea that mindset matters, saying, “Negative attitudes, rather than a lack of innate talent, are at the root of our numeracy crisis.”

A shift in our attitudes is crucial. How can we rectify this? However we might feel about math, we must be careful not to pass on negativity to our children. Instead, we can encourage, we can empower, and we can employ little tricks to avoid abandoning our kids to hours of tears over an endless worksheet. The idea is to cultivate a positive math culture in our home.

2. Incorporate Math-Themed Books

Believe it or not, many libraries have an incredible selection of math-themed books. And these aren’t just drill books or compilations of problem sets. Math-themed books run the gamut from delightfully illustrated stories to more complex solve-it-yourself mysteries, and even include longer literature selections centered around a mathematical theme. The key here, of course, is not to assign these books just during math lessons, but to scatter them throughout everyday life, making math a normal part of your household culture.

3. Allow Colored Pens and Markers

Admit it—doesn’t the chore list in your planner seem a lot more fun once you’ve written it out in with a set of colored pens?  We encourage creativity in other areas, yet we relegate math to the realm of sterile, monochromatic graphite. But consider this: mathematicians demonstrate an extraordinary amount of creativity in their thinking. A little glitter ink is not going to hurt anything. (Now glitter alone...that’s a different story.)

4. Use Number Stamps

Have a little one whose capacity to understand mathematical concepts and calculate arithmetic exceeds his or her writing stamina? Instead of requiring writing, let the child utilize a set of 0-9 number stamps and a stamp pad. This is enjoyable, requires much less dexterity, and will speed the process along. This can be fun for older kids, too.

5. Ignore (or Encourage!) Doodles

As long as the work is getting done and the answers are still legible, I don’t mark down for doodles, drawings, and notes. Maybe there are a dozen rockets around the margin—every single day.

Maybe the circles inside the 0s and 8s turn into faces, with a different expression every time. Some children—just like some adults—need to trail the pencil around the page while thinking. But is the doodling taking over, and nothing’s getting done at all?

6. Act as Your Child’s Scribe

For Language Arts and Science, Sonlight often recommends letting your child orally dictate answers to you as you jot them down on the activity sheets. But I’ve found this works extraordinarily well for Math, too. I can’t tell you how many times the dawdling hour has been transformed into record-speed math, just by my picking up a pencil and saying, “Why don’t I sit next to you and jot down what you tell me to write?”

This trick even works for multi-step calculations where the student needs to show work. Allowing your child to dictate empowers him or her to explain each step, increases understanding, heightens the ability to recall math facts, and sharpens mental math skills.

7. Talk about Math

Most of us, I think, incorporate literacy and pre-literacy themes into conversation without giving it much extra thought. With small children, we emphasize beginning sounds. As our children grow, we point out examples of alliteration, rhyming, homophones, and more. Yet for whatever reason, we’re often less likely to work numeracy topics into our everyday chatter. I’m not advising you turn every situation into a teachable moment (that’s a fast-track to burning out), but simply to be aware of the endless opportunities to weave in how math relates to real-world circumstances. At the very least, this will build a working familiarity with math vocabulary, so when things like place value or polynomials finally pop up in your student’s math curriculum, it won’t be the first time he or she’s ever heard the term. Talk about math demystifies it, gives context for it, boosts a child’s confidence, and breaks down the wall we’ve created culturally between math class and the rest of the world.

Make Math as integral as Reading in your homeschool. See all the Math options available to you here.

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Pursuing Passions and Sharing the Best Parts of You

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Pursuing Passions and Sharing the Best Parts of You

I was nine when I recognized I had the ability to draw. The kids at school made comments about my work, encouraging me to create more. At one point, I commented to my mother, “I wonder where I got my artistic ability.”

She walked me out to our stuffed, sweltering garage. We filed past the bikes and storage totes to the neglected dark corner. After a minute, Mama pulled out three oil paintings— two of fluffy Himalayan cats and one of an African savanna. I could almost feel their fur and cold noses as their blue eyes stared out softly from the canvas. The sun was setting over the savanna, and there was a lazy lion who looked as if he was going to take another 24-hour rest before hunting again.

That day in the garage, I saw a side of my mother I had never seen before, and I was completely inspired.

Being Intentional with Displaying Your Talents

At nine years old, I decided one thing. I did not want to be an artist who stopped creating art. I would do my best to keep my talents out of the garage. When I became a parent, I discovered how difficult that vow was to keep. There are many years when my watercolors dried out or my camera waited for repairs because diapers were the priority.

Parenthood can be all consuming, but I have always strived to share the best of me. I create. It is what I do. In the lean years, my canvas was cardboard. I made some pretty cool suits of armor for 5-year-old boys.

I urge you to find your passion again. It doesn’t have to be big or honed to perfection. It doesn’t have to even be a concrete skill; wonder, pause, observation, and rest are my favorite skills. I have made sure to share them with my kids. We notice minute details when we walk. We stop for bugs on the trail. Because our pockets always have a few rocks in them, I know they have learned to look for beauty in the small things.

My husband is a chef who loves to cook. His world is smells, textures, salt, and pinches of herbs. When he cooks, everyone tends to gather around to talk and taste. We allow meal making to be the event within the event. This is one of the ways he shares his gifts with the kids. They may never learn to cook much more than mac and cheese, but they will take away the fact that Dad has a talent he uses to serve others. We have cultivated our passions, even in small, family-sized ways. We are sharing our gifts.

What is your passion? Don’t let your proverbial paints dry out.

Three Ways to Make Room for Exploration and Sharing

The greatest gift of the homeschooling lifestyle is the ability to shape your day and choose your priorities. As parents, we need to show our kids how we, too, continue to grow and be passionate about the things we love.

For example, I love to learn through reading. My kids see me do that in my free time, but it has also become a part of their schooling time as well.

It was not always easy. convenient, or neat to help them find their interests. Making room for creativity and extra courses that fall out of the core three Rs is something we struggle to keep a priority every year, but I am thankful we have.

1. Keep the School Day Short

One of the greatest advantages of our homeschooling life is that we are not bound to an 8-hour work day. Our school hours are from 10 a.m. - 2 p.m. Although projects or in depth research may extend beyond that that a bit, the bulk of homeschooling is completed within those four hours each day. Over the thirteen years we have homeschooled, we’ve found that if everyone works diligently for those hours, we will have our work completed. The children still have plenty of time to get outside, explore, and create on their own without a ton of structure.

2. Give School Credit for Pursuing Passions

What does your student love to do in life? Make it a credit-able. You could make it the center of your curriculum if you are so inclined. My son loves computers and games, so he has CompuScholar and is learning coding. My daughter is a writer, so one year I joined NanoWriMo with her, and we challenged ourselves to write 50,000 words in 30 days. My younger daughters are obsessed with YouTube videos that create props for their American Girl dolls, so I signed them up for a challenge online. It is a short 4-week class where they will learn to sew easy outfits for their dolls. They are all learning in an informal interest-led way as I make way for them to embrace their interests and develop life skills.

3. Make Learning a Visible Priority in Your Life

It is easy to take a class online at night when the kids are sleeping or get up early and write (like I do) and never mention it to the kids. You may even feel a little protective of your hobby. But I think we need to communicate our interests to our kids. They need to see mom as a person outside of her role as mother and homeschool teacher. And knowing that mom has personal interests makes them more open to dialog about their passions as well.

Part of the reason I began writing and blogging was to show my children you can pursue your passions no matter what your household looks like. I often share with my teens how my learning is going. I want them to see that learning is a part of pursuing your passions, and it lasts a lifetime if you do it right.

Take Time for Pursuing Passions Again

If your talent is tucked into a box in the garage or attic, unpack it. If you feel untalented, explore things you used to like until you find something that reignites your interests. Most of the skills I have learned as an adult came from a library book or an online class.

What have you always wanted to do? Get inspired and begin in any way you can. I started watercolor painting again after I bought a simple watercolor kit for under $20. It doesn’t need to cost much at all. Your kids are watching you learn. Show them it never stops.

Choose a new interest for you or your children. See our options for homeschool electives.

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