Siblings Yesterday, Family Today

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I shift my weight onto my elbows again. I'm sprawled in my younger sister's living room chatting with my older sister and wife. It's pushing past midnight.

We've been discussing adoption, surrogate parenting and the struggles, frustrations, concerns and confusion we have already encountered on this journey. And we look toward the future. Painfully, however, the future is even less certain, less known, and full of more conflict and the persistent fog of war.

"I don't even want to go there," I say, trying to find a comfortable way to support my weight on the floor.

The women around me nod.

Half an hour later, as we start the drive home, my wife says, "I know we stayed late, but I wanted you to be able to talk with your sister. You don't get to do that much."

I don't.

But we have a bond that, while not incredibly close, allows us to chat late into the night about the ups and downs of life. We can laugh over dinner. We enjoy being together.

Homeschooling didn't create that bond. My older sister, four years my senior, was always in a radically different place in life. But our family had a lifestyle influenced by homeschooling. Life was an opportunity to learn, grow and share... together. And that togetherness persists through today, just hours after we said goodbye and headed home.

So, no, homeschooling doesn't create family connection. But it is a powerful catalyst that helps foster family bonds.

~Luke Holzmann
Filmmaker, Writer, Surrogate Father

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