Second-guessing: Did I make the right decision to homeschool?

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Second-guessing: Did I make the right decision to homeschool?

Big Brother Caleb loves to read to his little sister Abi.

"My books are in bad shape because they are so well used, but my kids' minds couldn't be more stimulated, educated, and happy—reading another beloved Sonlight book! Thank you for playing a huge part in making my children LOVE TO LEARN ™ !"

Lynn K. of Tifton, GA

Maybe you've hit some bumps since your first day of school...

You're two months in. Maybe your son is throwing a fit, your daughter is crying over a math problem, the dishes are piling up, and you feel in over your head.

At times like this, you wonder: Did I make the right decision to homeschool?

As you second-guess yourself, do you sometimes feel like a homeschool failure?

Not a Failure... A Learner

Let me encourage you: I know you can do this.

I challenge you to think of yourself not as a failure, but as a learner. That's how you want your kids to think when they face a challenge, right? You don't expect them to get everything right the first time.

When things don't go well in your homeschool, it's not that you've failed. The struggles just give you and your children an opportunity to grow. You can step back and say, "Well that didn't go very well. What could we do differently in the future?"

If you have that conversation with yourself or the children ten times in one day, that's still not failure. That's modeling to them how to grow. It's modeling that we can evaluate what we're doing and figure out how to do it better.

I encourage you do drill down and identify what's making you feel like a failure and making you wonder if you made a mistake to homeschool at all.

Second-guessing Your Own Angry Outbursts

Is it that you lose your temper with your children sometimes? I hear that from guilt-ridden moms often. So what can you do to move in the right direction in that regard?

  • Maybe you need to learn to apologize to your children when that happens.
  • Maybe you need to start the morning with a calming praise song.
  • Maybe you need more protein for breakfast.
  • Maybe you need to make a plan of what to do when you notice yourself getting riled up.

Second-guessing the Kids' Attitudes

Do you feel second-guess your choice to homeschool because your kids don't beg for school every day? Maybe you need to give them some grace, too. I've heard that kids new to homeschooling need at least one week of homeschooling for every year they were in regular school to adjust. It's a big change for you and them.

Not every day will be homeschool bliss. But if your kids are consistently struggling, perhaps they need more protein and less sugar for breakfast. Maybe they need more sleep. Maybe they need more time to play outside, or a short cuddle with you before school. Maybe you need to switch up your daily schedule. Maybe school will just be hard for them and they will develop perseverance as you kindly but firmly help them learn age-appropriate disciplines.

There's Help for Homeschooling

Whatever the issue that's causing you to second-guess your decision to homeschool, know that you have options. Don't give up! Instead, you could:

  • Be really honest with your spouse about how you're feeling, and brainstorm solutions to the problems you see.
  • Call a Sonlight Homeschool Advisor (at no charge) and chat with an experienced homeschooler about ideas you could try.
  • Talk to fellow homeschoolers and see what's worked for them.
  • Just try something different and see how it goes.
  • Pray, pray, pray. If God has called you to this, he will help you on the path.

Homeschooling won't always be smooth sailing. But take those rough seas as learning opportunities. As Thomas Edison supposedly said, "I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."Fortunately, you don't have to pioneer homeschooling the way Edison pioneered the light bulb. You have Instructor's Guides, a supportive community, Homeschool Advisors, and a complete curriculum to help you out.

Refuel Your Homeschool

With great rewards, come great sacrifice... and homeschooling is no different. Boy, some days are tough and make you second-guess your decision to homeschool. Download this free guide to help you remember WHY you chose to homeschool in the first place.

A Better You Because of Homeschooling

Homeschooling gives you the chance to learn from your mistakes every day. Think of how much you will have grown in patience, creativity and academic skills years from now if you stick with this amazing calling!

I've always said that anything worth doing will encounter resistance. And I believe homeschooling to be a high and worthy calling. Struggles probably don't mean that you're wrong to homeschool. They just come with the territory when you set out to do something great.

Please know that you are in my prayers. I count it an honor to pray daily for all Sonlight moms and dads who are working hard to do right by their families. We are in this together!

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