[I admit it: Despite--because of?--the grammar and spelling, my wife and I get a kick out of lolcats though it's not for everyone or always appropriate ...just sayin']
I've stopped breathing.
All of my energy and focus is consumed by my rage. I'm furious at my twerp of a little brother. We are at each other's throats. More accurately: I'm at his throat.
The things my parents had to deal with. <sigh>
Don't be fooled: Homeschooling doesn't automatically remove all sibling strife. But it does allow us kids experience dealing with people who frustrate us the most. And you wouldn't know it to look at us now, but Justin and I used to fight like, well, cats.
He sure has gotten less annoying and a whole lot cooler over the years.
...of course, I'm the one in the spandex. <smile>
Life is so much better when there's unity between brothers. And that's why, despite the difficulty of this time, I'm so grateful for the way you have united yourself with us in prayer for my family. That's a part of Christian brotherhood that is so amazing and good and powerful.
But there's a darker side to this Christian thing, too. Much like my destructive retaliation at my brother, too often we Christians are at each other's throats. Rather than being known by our love, we are often known by our infighting. And I'm feeling that frustration right now because of the way a certain group is acting toward us. They're being mean and annoying; picking on us. They're doing the things that, years ago when done by my brother, would send me over the edge.
Now, right now, it just makes me sad. Not to say that a significant level of indignation and retaliation didn't flood my heart before. But for the moment, I'm sorry. I'm sorry that we can't find a way to work together for the expansion of God's Kingdom and the better serving of the saints. I'm bummed. I'm frustrated. And more than once I've stopped breathing.
My prayer is that soon we will grow up as brothers and discover that, despite our differences and wrongs, we're really a whole lot cooler and less annoying than we currently think.
And, you know what?
I'd be happy to wear spandex again if that will make things better.
~Luke Holzmann
Filmmaker, Writer, Surrogate Father
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